9:58 AM

So why the tittle is Finding "ME"? soon you will figure it out once you read through it all, but a bit of it is because i got a little creative (remember finding dorry?) ok never mind, back to the serious talk.
my graduation April 2016

his post is something special to me, i'm writing this from the heart, as if my best friend is right in front of me, and i'm ready to pour my heart. so before i continue and bluber you all with my reasons and thoughts, let me give you a bit of recap to my recent life

*backward button*

So once upon a time there's this Indonesian girl who went to Singapore to study. She loved the country so much, and she called the place her second home. She met wonderful people in that Lion city, she encountered many memories that forever she will kept in heart, and by the time she reached her third year in that country, she had a question in her heart, "what's next?". She soon realized what she felt was not something extraordinary or what so ever. She realized everyone will eventually be in the stage where she was, deciding what's your next move in life after you finish your education or your degree. She thought to herself "well everyone got to decide their next step right?" and she kept that question in her heart. Days by days passed, and one by one she soon had to say her farewell to her friends that have decided to leave the country for good. she knew in her heart that going home was not an option, because she was not ready. 

Her motto ln life had always been "giving up is not an option", she made up that quote during her hard times while studying for her 'once a year exam'. Continuing on with the story, she kept that thought in her heart while she started her job search. she knew that foreigner like her had little opportunities, but she refused to think about the small probabilities, and decided to focus on all the chances that she got. It's not an easy phase for her, rejections after rejections she had to face that, Interviews that got your hopes up, but then made your day turned dark when you received the answer, NO. 

Life could be gloomy if you face rejection. she got her dark days, and decided to try again. Comparing her life with others will not made her situations easier, so she just prayed for encouragement. She remembered precisely for what she asked for. 

"God, I'm not ready to go home. You can see my heart, and you can see my true desire. But let Your will be done, if you want me to stay, let me stay. If not, give me a big heart to let go of what I want"

But the great thing was, God never let her give up. He opened a door, and she got employed after months of trying. She was so excited, SHE GOT THE JOB!!

The End? 
(Not yet..)

now, this where you guys might think the story end perfectly well and the post will end with a beautiful quote right?  my friend, it doesn't end here. She's still not happy.

She worked in a big japanese retail company. she encountered difficulties, but she still had that thought, "i worked hard to be at this place, so many tears, many fail interviews" so she refused to let any negative thoughts get in the way. during the first few months are always the though one. You need to adapt to the working environment, need to focus to get things done correctly, and always seeking to improve. After 3-4 months she started to feel a bit of home, she got to know her colleagues more, and it made things more bearable. At first she was very reserved, but soon she started to open up and met awesome people that she could call "friends". Days passed, months passed, and yet she felt this weird feeling in her heart. 

She used to be full of energy, full of passion, and dreams. but now she didn't had the time to think about all those things, her job captivated her. she worked for long hours, but it's not that part that got her mind. she's missing her old self. she missed that passionate girl.

Months passed, and things got worse. Many days turned to dark days, and everyday felt like a repetition. She woke up, work, eat and sleep. The moment she got home , the loneliness started to kick in. She thought to her self, if she asked for it then she should endured it. Until one day, when she was doing her usual youtube time, she caught this one Indonesian youtuber where she shared her "change destiny story". She watched it all, and after that moment finished, she got that light bulb in her head. She thought to her self,

"it is still possible, to change my destiny and find my true self to work for what you really dream of".

Some people might said that she's young, she can still change her destiny in few more years, she was 21 at that time. but time is not the matter, it's about what you really want in life, and whether you want to take action for it or not. She decided to make her own decision, which is  to move on. 

After almost one year, she's finally ready to go home and chase her dreams. life is full of surprises, and you never know if you never try. She decided to pursue it, refusing to give up. It was the right decision because deep in her heart she knew, it is her passion that she's chasing. Chase your dreams, and live courageously!

Moral of the story?

Sometimes in life people might think, "oh you're quiting? so you're giving up ?". 

My friend, never afraid to take that decision to move on. It's your own life and people have no right to judge or to determine what you should do. you know it's the right thing to do if you have that ultimate peace in your heart. I know i made the right decision, because you can't be stuck at a place where you know you're not growing. Everyone has their own reasons, so find yours and pursue it.

Here are few questions that you can ask yourself when you are a working professional :

1. What's your purpose for a job? (is it growth? company recognition? money? family?)
2. Are you happy?
3. Are you developing or growing in your job?
4. Is the company fair enough to judge you base on your performance?
5. Is the job relevant for your future career?
6. Your 5 years career plan?

You will find many interesting answers to all of that, but you are the own who have the power to create a decision, Make your decision wisely, because in the end of the day, you have to take full responsibility for it :)

Before this post ends, I just want to say when you enter the working world, feel the pressure and start to question your self, think of this.  You will meet 2 types of people that will tell you : 


This statement is true. When I felt the pressure and the stress, I started to compare. I heard stories, and I saw many of my friends from other industry struggling also with their work. Time is something very valuable if you have deadlines to meet. So this kind of people will tell you, what you feel is completely normal, because everyone who work will eventually go through this "stress" phase. So they just said, "be tough and bear with it"


"Why you have to go through all of that, if it's not something you like?'
Remember Steve Jobs guys? oh sorry silly question, who doesn't know him, the famous guy who created the brand  that most people use. I stated him as an example, because I admire everything about him. People like him, Walt Disney, JK Rowling, Thomas Alfa Edison, you name the rest, They have something in common. They believe in their vision, determined to get those dreams, and work hard even though they faced rejections after rejections. 
So if what you're working is not what you really passionate about or what your dream is, why stay?
If that position will enhance your career in the future, then it's a different story. Not all people are born to be entrepreneurs, to take the risk and go for what they believe in. If you career plan is to stay in the corporate world, then start revaluate your current company now. Is it really the company of your dreams?


In the end it's all about your point of view

I'm an idealist, that's true. But, it's not too late to really start believing, and start doing. So if you feel like you're in the midst of something that's not you, start to revaluate your situation again. Remember guys, it's never too late to pursue your dreams. 
When I was in university, there's this 65 years old lady who pursue her bachelor degree. She fought her way off, visited the library and stay for the longest. She want that degree, and she determined to get it. 

What's your excuse? and why wait?



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  1. Literally thatnk you so much for this post. It's so inspiring. And original!! I feel like I needed that. xox

  2. Well noted; thank you for sharing this post. It'll help me a lot 'cause it happens on me now :")




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